The Spy Next Door
The Spy Next Door has all of the cool choreography that Jackie Chan fans have come to expect. That’s the good news. All of it. The neighbours should have been tipped off to espionage in their community right out of the chute as Chan clearly goes by an alias with the name of “Bob” Ho. He’ a suburban dweller whose main squeeze Gillian (Amber Valletta) conveniently lives next door. She’s cliché clueless about his clandestine job but very aware that her children Farren (Madeline Carroll), Ian (Will Shadley) and to a much lesser extent Nora (Alina Foley) don’t think much of Bob. He’s about to tell Gillian all on the eve of his retirement from “the Company” when she’s called away on a family emergency and circumstances conspire to leave the three kids in the charge of the much maligned Bob. Parenting proves to be hard enough but then a Russian plot to hold the world hostage pops up and Bob is faced with the added pressure of being pressed back into service while keeping the trio out of the line of fire. Will kids in the audience at least find this entertaining? Not if they clue into how annoying the on screen child actors are. As for entertaining the adults with those kids, what does it say about a film when Billy Ray Cyrus in his worst mullet ever gets the best lines?